Discussion 3 - In the Victorian era, grief was expressed

Death & dying discussion

DISCUSSION 3

In the Victorian era, grief was expressed in such a way so that gloom and darkness seem to have been the hallmarks of mourning in the latter part of the 19th century. Death was an acknowledged and public event, and responses to death were at the forefront of the social customs of the time.

There is an unending list of rules and regulations regarding death, burials, and mourning in this period. Not to follow the rules meant that the offender was somehow immoral or dishonoring the deceased. Etiquette rules related to the mourning period were many and complicated. They encompassed how long one should mourn, for whom, as well as what should be worn in each phase of mourning. There were also rules about what those attending the funeral should wear and how to behave.

In other cultures there were intense and extensive mourning rituals that were culturally honored such as the Ghost Keeping ceremony of the Lakota. One of the seven rites of the sacred Pipe.

Kastenbaum implies these practices in the U.S. may not be as strong.

"The U.S. death system has not characteristically provided strong and extended support for the bereaved. Avoiding, denying and expecting the bereaved to “snap back” soon after the death have been more common patterns of response."

Discuss and compare these or other cultures ritualized attitudes toward grief and mourning with those currently practiced in the U.S. You may wish to do some online research into these other practices to a get a feel for the attitudes being expressed. How similar or different are these practices.